Tuesday, May 3, 2011

I am still here.

Days 13 through 21 (and 22, and 23) got busy.

I got distracted by life...I did not post/write anything, but I refuse to abandon my blog...so here is a new post for you:

Days 13 & 14
I did fine, stuck to my plan.

Day 15 (Easter, Food, Family)
I knew I would want dessert when everyone else was enjoying it, so I planned ahead. I sliced up some glorious strawberries, found some sugar-free angel food cake (not bad actually!) and some sugar-free whipped cream. I was SO proud of myself! By golly, I was gonna have a yummy dessert and eat it too!

Then, my family arrived. One of my nieces had whipped up her own Easter dessert. Cupcakes. ""Made 'em 'specially for Easter!!") Everyone else was chowing down on them. No one was paying attention to what *I* was doing/eating. (insert evil laugh HERE) Not even me.

I ate one (two).

Why did I do that? I kinda felt obligated. "Well, she did make these 'specially for Easter...", "It's a holiday, so I am supposed to splurge and eat junk..."

I ended up with a full-on sugar high...yep.

...and so the cycle began...
Day 16
All I ate all day was tons of strawberries, sf whipped cream and sf angel food cake. Not good. I used absolutely no portion control. Just because something is sugar-free does not mean you eat it without limits.

Day 17
Since I had "already messed up"... I started eating the Easter candy. (((cringe))) I honestly, should have thrown it out as soon as the family left on Easter Sunday.

(SIDE RANT: they all KNOW that I am trying to do no-sugar etc. and that we give B *very-very-very* little candy, so why the heck was my house filled with that sort of stuff when they left? Yes, Scott got some candy and little B got a couple of things, but *I* was given a lot of it too. A LOT... peeps, chocolate, etc...Next year, I'm posting signs on the doors! Yes, I know, I sound like an ungrateful piece of crap... but does anyone see my point?)

Days 18, 19, 20, 21...
I convinced myself that I was doing "OK" and I could half-ass it through the week "since I was (partially) on vacation" and "I deserved to enjoy it" and "I had already messed up"...

Bojangles biscuits for breakfast with seasoned fries and SWEET tea. Little to nothing for lunch, (so I could "make up for what I did at breakfast") What a joke. Binge for supper, but convince myself that Subway or something was "healthy" so the HUGE chunk of white bread I was eating was okay.

This brings us to today...

My knees hurt.
I have been eating sugar. (a lot)
No real weight lost.
I have no energy.
Feeling crappy, both physically & emotionally.

Like I said earlier, what a joke.
I lie to myself and I know it.

Guess I need to reevaluate my thoughts and willpower and get back to you...

1 comment:

  1. Oh, man. I'm sorry the weekend was tough. It sounds like you got going by those cupcakes. It's so, so important that you figure out a way to say no without feeling as if you're hurting folks' feelings. Mine is this: "Thanks, that looks great, but you know I watch my sugar." Or...make a dessert for everyone- one they won't know is l/c! And send home extras. Anyhoo, sorry to get preachy, lol! I hear your frustration.