Own it.

I want to elaborate on my compliment comment...

I am the queen of turning a compliment into something else completely. Try me. If you are around me enough, then you know from experience that I can turn just about any compliment into a complaint about my weight.

I heard one time that Southern women, especially, had a hard time accepting a compliment. We take an "I like your dress" or "that dress looks nice on you" and immediately fire back a half frown and something like "well it makes me look washed out" or "my arms look so fat in it". We do it so easily and so naturally that half the time no one even notices. It's usually set up nicely with a "thanks, but...(fill in complaint here)."

Why can't we just say "thanks"?

Even when we think we are just saying "thanks", we are still saying something like "Thanks. Ugh, I paid way too much for it." Or "Thanks, but I like your dress better." That is *still* slashing the value of said compliment.

Dang it.

Own it. Take the compliment and let it be. We need to stop cutting ourselves down; stop analyzing and essentially undoing every compliment that we receive. We are all awesome.

Now, seriously, let's own it. 

awkward

Compliments are awkward for me.



But keep them coming.



That is all. Thank you. :)

The Swing Stopped

Looking back at my May post, I am proud to say that I have not been swinging anymore. I am trudging along with my latest Weight Watchers adventure. Even Hotty Scotty finally asked me when I was going to stop torturing my body (and him) with my constant on/off/changing dieting. Coming to the realization that my issues are affecting my family...well, it impacts me far more than many other things.

I am just as obsessive about calculating my points and planning my days out as I was years ago, but I do not think that it's a bad thing, really. I have managed to not obsess about sugar and I have not been hungry all the time like I was a couple of months ago. Why? What changed? Well, when I fill my day with healthy foods that are naturally lower in sugar and higher in fiber, I seem to be more satisfied. Duh!

If I get 42 points a day (yep, I'm that big - and they are adjusted down a few) let's examine a couple of different menu options:

Example 1

Breakfast:
Tea or Coffee w/Splenda & Stevia (0)
Splash of SF caramel creamer (1)
1 pk Quaker Instant Cheese Grits (3)
1 SF Jell-o Rice Pudding Snack (2)

Lunch:
1 Arby's Jr. Roast Beef Sandwich (5)
2 pk Arby's Sauce (3)
Chobani Lemon Greek Yogurt (4)
1/2-1 cup Celery sticks

Dinner:
2 cups organic salad greens (0)
1/4 cup reduced-fat Sargento cheese(2)
4 T Kraft Light Raspberry Vinaigrette (3)
2 t Olive Oil (2)
1/4 cup Blue Cheese (3)
3 oz Pork with 1/4 c stuffing (6)

Snacks:
1 cup cherries (0)
1/2 cup frozen blueberries (0)
1 light String Cheese (2)
8 oz FF milk (2)
1 hard sourdough pretzel (3)

This menu meets all of my healthy guidelines (fruits/veg servings, health oils, dairy, etc.) AND...it is a lot of food!

Example 2

Breakfast:
McDonald's Bacon/Egg/Cheese biscuit (11)
2 Hashbrowns (8)
Large Mocha (12)

Lunch:
Pizza (3 slices of PH Medium Hand-Tossed Pepperoni) (18)
...

If you were adding up the points, you can see that I would have already gone over by 7 and this does not include dinner or snacks. Plus no healthy guidelines have been met except for the dairy from the cheese on the pizza and maybe some in the mocha. Look how high the points (therefore, CALORIES) would have been that day if eating like that continued into the evening.

It is all about decisions. Example 1 even had some "fast food". It is possible to enjoy some stuff that you really do like once in a while (I have a weird love for Arby's roastbeef, sorry!)...it's about balancing those things and not making every meal an "out" meal.

I am down 16.2 pounds. If I had just made better choices last year, it could be soooo much more. Maybe not. I just do not know. I have really been working on my head lately. Maybe I needed to go through all of this back-and-forth mess in order to really learn some good, healthy eating habits. I am nowhere near an expert, but I am definitely trying going to learn from my own mistakes.

Some of my happy is returning. I think my BFF would vouch for that. :)

MeNtAL

Scenario:
Me and my BFF head out for GirlsNightOut. Bonefish, raspberry martinis, looking hott... We get finished with dinner and I'm all like "let's go do something!" We drive downtown and finally settle on a place to go shake it (there is a lot more to that story, but we will leave it at that!) and I am all for it. I mean, so is she, but she is my "trail-blazer". I am not sure she agrees, but she is!

Now, if you know me... especially the past-6-years-or-so-Christina, then I know you just backed up and read the first paragraph again.

Christina wanted to go out? Like out-out?

that. right there.

BFF admitted she was a bit surprised. I guess I was too. But I am here to tell ya, I have been working on myself. Physically? Yeah, yeah, same old insanity there. I mean MeNtALLy.

Am I happy being the big girl? No
Do I still deserve to be happy and do fun things? Yes

Am I going to stop battling my weight? No
Should I at least enjoy my life along the way? Yes

I have started looking around me. There are ALL shapes and sizes. I am one of them. I am not happy with my shape, but dang...it does not mean I should hole up in the house and hide from the world and all it has to offer.

I love to dance. (albeit not well) I LOVE good, strong bass lines in the music. I love getting dressed up and wearing something that flatters MY body. I love time with my BFF.

...but in order to enjoy all of those things...

I have to love me.